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| Pregnant at 36 was fine but 41? I don't know. |
Would a baby bring the family closer OR would a new baby bring more stress and isolate us from each other?
Those questions and more haunt me. I can only divulge them to my husband so many times before he actually closes the case and says it's too late. I definitely don't want another one. ugh. How would that make me feel and what would I do then?
I discuss this with my close friend Scarlett who hails from Brooklyn. She's awesome. She told her husband whom she met late in life, "Look I know you feel like you'd get lost in the whole second baby thing but I want you to know, if I don't do this, I'll always wonder what if. I'm not asking for a third and I promise I won't let you down. Our time together will be there, but my baby carrying abilities will not."
She wowed me with her strength of character. She knew what she wanted, she put it out there for her husband. He bought it and they delivered a son nine months later. He's a beautiful sweet boy and his name is Tristan. They now together have one of each, a girl name Brisa and a boy named Tristan. They together make a sweet family. I've never met a more sincere and caring person than Scarlett. She is earth incarnate. Did I forget to mention she was 42 when she had him? She's the Gwen Stefani of Conway, South Carolina!!!
But one thing that Scarlett didn't have to do is go through fertility. Lucky for me I have one embryo frozen and that means I don't have to go through trying to fake my body into being pregnant, or be there for my hubby's out-patient extraction of sperm, and putting the egg and sperm together to make an embryo. Whew! No not all of that again. That's a whole long process of creation and taking my blood through a tiny vein in my hand (I have tiny veins so getting my blood is vicious!) we'll can anyone say ?!/?*%!^#
According to BabyCenter.com there are several pros and cons to having a baby in your 40's so it's going to be all about my attitude in the game:
Baby Center said, "All these downsides can be disheartening — but don't forget that some women do get pregnant well into their 40s, and many of them have complication-free pregnancies and healthy babies. And while older mothers may be at higher risk for negative pregnancy results, the overall number of such incidents is low."
Another quote to take note of: "Miscarriage rates begin to skyrocket in your 40s as well. From age 40 to 44, the rate is 35 percent, and it rises to more than 50 percent for women 45 and older (compared to 10 percent at age 20 and 12 percent at age 30). After age 40, the risk of pregnancy complications, such as high blood pressure and diabetes is twice as high as it is for a woman in her 20s."
We'll you know what I didn't want a baby in my 20's......and my 30's we'll that idea progressed slowly until I met the right person. I'll be 42 in July of 2015 and I'm hoping to be at least pregnant by then!!
The help part of the equation is to be debated. I'm hoping to have a mothers' helper in all of this, not b/c I can't manage all of the kids, the schedules, the laundry, being there for my husband or the taxi driver but because I can admit I CAN'T DO IT ALL.
I rest on this debate about having another child. I want one. I want another girl, another boy, whatever. Healthy please!!!
Are you thinking about all the sleepless nights I'm going to have? I've done that already. It's worth every sleepy day lying next to my baby in my dream house. Yep, I dream. It's okay for you to do it too.
Now back to my being something to everyone. My 14 year old stepson is coming over for an extended weekend visit. Oh, the energy that kid has................... I hope I have enough chips in the house.
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| Pregnant at 36 with twins. My hubby and stepson. |
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